How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime

In this short video Nadine Burke Harris explains how adverse childhood experiences impacts the health of the child and continues to do so over the lifetime of the person. She explains in scientific terms why this occurs and ways the impacts can be reduced. She believes that this is a public health issue and should be addressed as such with multidisciplinary teams available to help affected individuals to heal the trauma and reduce the impacts.

How to let yourself be your whole self?

When you have suffered a painful start to life you bury your true self inside under layers and layers of protection. The innocent part of you is wrapped up safely, hidden away and kept under wraps for fear that exposing it will result in more pain, loss or abandonment.

This makes it very difficult to know who you are and to live your life with joy. Basically, you walk around with a gaping hole in your heart as part of you, the core part of you is missing in action. It is simply not there, disowned, buried, ignored and left in the dark.

This results in a sense of emptiness and loss that cannot be filled by material objects or worldy pursuits. No matter what you achieve or do, you still feel empty and like something is missing, beacause it is. You are missing, the truest part of who you are, the indivdual, unique aspects of you.

We often modify who we are to fit in to different situations. We show different parts of ourself or aspects of us to different people and situations. At work you may be smart, responsible, friendly, helpful, kind and thoughtful. At home with friends you may be more casual, relaxed and playful. On the sport field you may be more rambunctious, competitive and blood thirsty. With your kids you are hopefully gentle, loving, kind and attentive.

But how are you when you are with yourself? Do you sit quietly and listen within to hear what it is your heart needs? Do you even know that your heart speaks to you or your inner child? Do you give yourself any time in the day to be with you? Do you even know what it is that you really like to do? What activities make your heart sing? What is it that you thoroughly enjoy doing, where time just flies past and you feel really peaceful and complete afterwards? These are things your true self, your unique self likes to do, things that fill your emotional needs up, they fill up your cup of life, your reserves and fuel for completing the rest of the tasks you need to do in your day to day busyness.

If you are not taking the time to listen to and meet your heart’s needs, then it is likely that your cup is close to empty. You may feel drained, exhausted and wondering whether it is worth the effort doing all the things you do. You are probably craving change, but not sure how to go about it or if you have the energy to try.

reading in natureUncover who you really are and sing through life. Make time for your true self and true desires and you will feel much better. It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive. Your heart’s desire may be for long walks in nature; to simply sit and read a book; to play with your dog; to cook a nice meal; to watch the sunset; to play sport; to spend time with friends; to eat chocolate cake while savouring every bite and letting it ooze down your throat.

Slowly, simply living life, enjoying it more fully, being present to each moment as it goes by. Less stress, less rush, less fuss and bother, less worry or forcing things to happen, less controlling and mind chatter. Just relax below that, slow your breath and drop into your heart centre, listen to it, it will tell you what you need to be happier and more fulfilled.

As you meet your own needs you become more of who you truly are, as you are allowing it back to the surface. It doesn’t matter if others don’t like doing what you like doing. It doesn’t matter whether you can only do it for an hour a day or an afternoon a week. What matters is you take the time to connect in with your heart and breathe through any stress and tension there to get back to a state of peace and oneness with your core self.

If you still have reistance to connecting with your heart, just send love to those parts of you who are scared to be seen. Breathe in gold light through your crown chakra and into each chakra, then see the gold light spreading through every cell of your body, every muscle, every fibre, all your DNA, RNA and molecules. This helps to relax, calm and soothe the body. It gives the cells what they need to start healing and releasing that which no longer serves them. Gold light is a high vibration that can help shift out that which no longer serves us and that which holds us back from living life more fully.

Embrace who you really are, your uniqueness. It truly is okay to be you. There is no need to hide it or yourself away from the world. While those in your early life may not have honoured who you are, you can and must if you want to be peaceful and happy. Own it, own who you are and have fun in your unique way.

When you let yourself have pleasure, by doing what you love, you will discover how you can do that and be of service to others. There is a way that your passion can become helpful to others and even a source of income for you, if you wish it to be so. It is up to you. You may not want to turn it into a business adventure. You may just want it to be your hobby, your special time out just for you. Whatever it is, do it, honour who you are and let your real self shine. No need to hide it under a bushel, let your love out, your light shine through and be at peace. For you truly are safe and deeply loved throughout the Universe. You just need to clear out the old story and residue, so you can see the truth and live your life without fear and with a lot more joy. So be it. Amen.

Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) can be used to help shake out any fear, tension and trauma you have within. If we’re caught in fear it is usually due to past painful events that hurt us and we’re wanting to avoid experiencing that again, so we contract, limit ourselves and our expression in an attempt to stay safe and not experience any more hurt, rejection or shame.

If you were ridiculed for your uniqueness, your passion and joy when doing what you love most, you may have decided not to do it any more. You may have given it up. Denied yourself what you loved most, so that you would fit in, be more accepted and less ridiculed.

It is understandable as a child you would do that to protect yourself, but as an adult it doesn’t matter what other people think so much. Clear out the old pain and trauma with TRE so you can open back up to fully being you and doing what you love. You will feel so much better when you take the time to spend on your passions, your joys. It will positively impact all of your interactions because you will be more content and peaceful in yourself.

When you honour you, you give permission to others to follow their passions and joys too. You role model to them that it’s okay to be who they are. The world needs more of us doing this so there is less anger and conflict in the world. See how big an impact this can have. It’s not selfish or self-indulgent to take time for your passion, your hobbies, your joys. It’s a gift you give to yourself and the world.

By Jodi-Anne (22 May 2016).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

It didn’t start with you – inherited family trauma

Here’s a link to an article about a great new book explaining how we can inherit trauma from past generations of family members and how we can use family constellations and other methods to heal it.

The article (and the book) include case studies of clients that were not be helped with traditional psychology approaches that focused on what had happened throughout the client’s life. Once they opened to the idea that the trauma, pattern, addiction, health issue may have been inherited, solutions were found using Family Constellations concepts.

If you have an issue that doesn’t seem to shift no matter what you do, consider looking further back in your family line at where it may have come from. I can help you to do this.

it didn't start with you book

How to overcome the tendency to isolate?

People isolate themselves when they are feeling overwhelmed by life. They may have been hurt badly and not trust anyone or they may be fearful and depressed. Either way hiding out alone feels safer than risking contact with a world that to them seems harsh, unforgiving, cruel and threatening.

Life is not like that at all. You are always surrounded in the love of God/Source Energy, however, most people are so busy in their heads that they don’t notice it. You rush from one place, one task, one test to the next. You don’t rest fully in the peace of God/Source Energy, in your heart or spend time in nature deeply connecting to the Earth and your true nature.

People rush, rush, rush and then feel exhausted, then they wonder why they have no energy to enjoy life, to go and have fun. They get caught up in negative thoughts and conditioning, which just play out on an endless loop, until they wake up from this state of exhaustion and seek the light.

Sadly all this busy-ness has led to diminished connections with other people. It is rare for you to stop and meet another fully, to look into their eyes and feel their essence, to hear what is going on in their hearts and to talk honestly, truthfully about their experience of life.

empty-cup

You are all walking around like empty cups. Your cups should be filled with love and be over flowing from you to others. Connecting to God, to nature, to each other deeply fills your cup. But most people, nearly everyone, thinks they are too busy to slow down and have their cup filled.

If conflict occurs and you feel fearful, your cup is drained of the little amount of love you have in it. Then you feel empty, drained, exhausted. You know that it was the conflict with that person who led to you feeling drained, so you vow to isolate yourself from people like that, so you don’t get drained further. But in isolating yourself out of fear your cup stays empty. You get stuck in fear and that is the opposite vibration of love.

To love fully you need to be filling your own cup from God/Source/Nature, then you have so much love it doesn’t matter if a little conflict occurs. You will be able to respond to it more lovingly and be less affected by it as your cup is full and over flowing. Instead of getting upset, angry or blaming the person for negatively affecting you, you would simply send them love, feel compassion for them, as they are obviously having a hard time and have an empty cup.

So the key to feeling good is not to isolate out of fear, but to connect with love to God/Source/Nature, to listen to your heart and do things that bring you joy. Do this and your cup is filled, then it is easier to face the other aspects of life.

With people that you do feel safe and good around, make sure you take the time to connect, to talk heart to heart, to fel seen, heard, validated. You will never have that kind of connection with everyone, but when your cup is full the interactions that are less pleasant don’t bother you so much.

Yes you should have boundaries between yourself and those who disrespect you, abuse you or take advantage of you. That is self love, to say no to their demands. But make sure you spend time with those who do love you, respect you and treat you well. Don’t isolate and hide – at home, in social media, in work, etc. Come out into the open and breathe in fresh air, absorb the love, take the risk to open your heart and be present to what life is bringing you. It is all helping you grow and all leading you forward to a higher vibration, to the vibration of love. It is a process, a long one for many who resist out of fear, but know you will get there in the end, everyone will.

When you are isolating out of fear it is like you are stuck, frozen, unable to move and life life fully. Symbolically, that is what is also occurring within you. Any buried emotions, trauma, stress and tension gets held in your body, in your muscles and it is this stuck energy that leads to physical pain such as aching backs, shoulders, hips knees, necks. It is this tension, this rigidity, locked-in that stops our bodies from moving fluidly, from gliding with ease through life.

When our body gets locked up tight so does our thinking. It becomes less flexible. We see more in black and white terms. We see less love and goodness in the world because we are seeing through the lens of pain, of tightness, of soreness, of defeat, anger, disappointment and fear. The way we feel inside our body affects our thoughts and way of seeing in the world. We see less opportunity for change, for improvement. We slump down into resignation, shut down, overwhelm. We curl into a ball to protect ourself.

All of this inner tension, stress and pain can be eased if we use Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) to activate the body’s natural process for releasing that tension, stress and trauma.

The body has a way to ‘shake it off’, to cleanse that energy adn use up all of the fight/flight molecules stored in the body from all the times when we were triggered, but didn’t fight back, run away or speak our truth. All the cortisol and adrenaline was released into our blood stream to prime us to act, but we didn’t so it never got used up and these chemicals stay in the body as incomplete trauma activations. They build up and it is part of what causes our muscles to then tighen up and ache.

TRE can help you to shake out those energies, to complete the trauma activations, so that your body can finally open back up, relax, see and feel more clearly from the now, rather than feeling from the past. Clearing out that stress and tension enables you to see differently, to have easier social interactions, to feel more playful and safe.

When our body is tight, wound up, on hyper-alert, of course it is hard to play or joyfully interact with others, but that all changes when you complete the trauma activations and enable your body to come out of high alert back into peace. It is well worth doing so you can come out of isolation and enjoy life.

When you have healed the hurts in your body, it is much easier to open your heart, to love yourself, others and just BE. You can be present to all that occurs, choosing faith and peace, knowing it is all perfect and all of life is made of God and is doing God’s will. There are no bad people or places or choices, just learning opportunities. Just people who have closed their hearts to love and the light and who will open back up in time. Nothing to do or force, just trust God’s plan and love all that arises.

Send love to your fear, to your pain and to your sadness. Send love to those who you perceive have harmed you. That is what they need most, love. Noone who is feeling good about themself and is at peace within would willingly hurt another. They know that to do so hurts themself. So know that anyone who does hurt you is suffering, they are struggling within themself and with life.

You don’t need to accept the poor treatment, but try to send them love instead of hate or anger or judgement. They are judging themselves harshly and that is what leads to their angst. It can be torture when you are stuck in self defeating patterns of self judgement, self hate and self loathing.

Sadly many people speak to themselves more harshly than they would speak to others. They beat themselves up internally calling themselves names and feeling not good enough. It can be a very dark place. Know that noone will treat you as badly as you treat yourself!

When you are in that dark place the whole world seems dark, but the light is there, just waiting for you to see it and let it in. This is the process of awakening to love, light, God, peace and joy. This is the path back to wholeness. Become your own best friend, be loving and kind to yourself, say nice things about yourself to yourself. Be the loving parent you wished you had.

As you become more loving to you internally, the outside world will mirror it, bringing you people who treat you with more kindness and love. Life is just a mirror showing us what we still have to heal.

Heal it and see the truth, there is nothing but love around us. Anything else is an illusion created by our minds out of fear, judgement and hate. Heal it and you wil see peace, joy and beauty wherever you go. for it is there, we just have to clear out the blocks, the filters to seeing it. Blessed BE. Amen.

Remember everyone is on this journey, you are all isolating out of fear to some degree, not showing your true self for fear of rejection or ridicule. Yet you all are longing for love and acceptance, so why not give it. Just love everyone as they are. If you could do this the pain and fear will drop away and you will all feel safer, happier and more able to enjoy life fully. Choose to love and be loving, that is the key. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (5 November 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Why is it useful to spend time in nature?

nature-scenes-04Nature vibrates at the rate of Source energy. It helps us slow down and our vibration rise. It is calming and soothing to our nervous systems that are over stimulated from modern living and rushing around.

Nature shows us life’s pace – things grow, bloom, wither and die. There is no fanfare or drama linked to these events, it is simply part of life. There are times when life seems bountiful – good weather, nutrients, enough water and plants thrive. There are times when life seems poor, harsh and cruel – no water, drought, blistering heat. Yet the plants and animals simply adjust, changing their behaviour to suit the circumstances. Some may perish. This is not a personal vendetta or attack. It is simply life in the bigger picture.

All species need some form of control to limit numbers and destruction of the ecosystem from over population. Different species eat each other. Pests and disease come to wipe out some populations. It is all part of the cycle of life.

Trees don’t take it personally when the wind blows, pushing them around. They just bend as much as they can and let the wind blow. They don’t go into ‘Why me, it’s so unfair, i’m a good tree, I haven’t hurt anyone, etc’. They just bend and adjust. They just keep growing. And life can be much simpler and more enjoyable for us if we learn to do the same.

It is our emotional reactions to events in our life that create the suffering. If we just flow with life, accepting what occurs and adjusting to it as need be, we wouldn’t suffer as much.

The loss of that job or partner is not a tragedy, it is a step in your evolutionary process, it is leading you forward to something far greater.

When we are comfortable in our lives, we just sit and be still through much of it. This is beneficial, a time of rest, restrengthening. The bud is beginning to reach out, absorb the sun and is readying itself to burst forth in bloom when the time is right.

Most of us will not step out of our nice, comfy place without a push, a life event catapaulting us forward to face whatever needs to be faced for our growth and evolution. We need the storms in order to grow. The floods and fires shake things up so that new life can spring forth once the tidal wave of change recedes.

Big events in our lives, unexpected massive changes to our lives are like these storms. They unhook us from our stable foundations and force us to adapt, to find a way to evolve and grow.

Human beings are part of nature and are also exposed to similar cycles and patterns of growth. Nature itself shows us the most useful way to respond. Nature adapts and moves on. The deer run when the lion is around and rest when it is not. The bear hibernates in winter. He doesn’t push through, trying to force things to be different than they are. He just does the wisest thing he can to conserve his energy and stay strong. He rests, sleeps deeply and awakens when the time is right and the harvest is present. We do the same.

Spending time in nature helps us in so many ways. The green colour which is so prevalent in natural scenes soothes our heart and helps the heart chakra open. The blue of water soothes our throat making it easier for us to calmly speak our truth. The beauty of nature leaves us in awe of life and to creation, helping us consider that there may be a creator who produced all of this magnificence.

Nature soothes us, replenishes us and helps us ground within our bodies, to come out of the head or mind chatter and be present in the moment. Walking bare foot on grass helps us heal. It allows the energy of the Earth to travel up our legs and calm the body. It is a good cure for jet lag too, helping us adjust to the new location / new energy that you are in.

Nature truly is our friend, of great benefit to us and when we destroy it, we are harming ourselves literally. Without nature in abundance the air we breathe would not get cleansed or purified, the water cycle would not work as well and pollution would stagnate in our water instead of being filtered out. The soil would erode without tree roots holding it in place and the land would become barren, making it more difficult to grow our food.

When we disturb the balance of nature we suffer as well. So plant some trees, support your local environmental groups and give thanks to this wonderful planet who supports us, nourishes us and heals us, all without asking for recognition, compensation or reward. Thank you Mother Nature. Thank you. Blessed BE, Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (04 November 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How do you stop being over controlling?

People are over controlling when they feel scared and vulnerable underneath. They micro-manage everything in an attempt to stay safe and have everything work out as they want it to. If another person does not behave the way they want, the first person is likely to get very angry as they fear the consequences of that person’s actions will be devastating.

Underneath it all is FEAR, lots of fear, hurt and sadness which has built up over the person’s lifetime. The controlling personality is just a defense mechanism to cover up the fear and protect their vulnerability.

In reality the process of over controlling is exhausting, it is done frantically, manically. It is not a peaceful process and it certainly isn’t kind. A controlling person can be very bossy and judgmental as they push through trying to force the outcome they need to feel safe.

They are not thinking about the other person’s feelings or needs, only their own. While this sounds selfish, it is not really. It is not coming from a place of my needs are more important than yours. It is coming from a space of ‘I need you to do this in order for me to feel safe, I am in danger unless you do this, you must do this, please do this’. It is a painful way to live, so desperate and afraid.

Many controlling people appear tough, cold, judgmental, unemotional, but that is just the mask they wear to cover up their vulnerability and fear. What the person really needs is to drop the mask, feel the feelings, release the hurt and sadness, learn to speak their truth in kind and loving ways. For instance:

‘I know I have been pushy and controlling wanting you to do certain things. I’m sorry that I have been so forceful. I was afraid that if you didn’t do those things, X would happen and that worries me. I’m scared Y will occur and I wanted to avoid that. I understand you don’t feel the same ways as me and you may have felt I was saying “You are not good enough as your are”. Please know that I never meant for you to feel that. You are a beautiful child of God on your own path of healing and wholeness. I was just scared and wanted to avoid what I feared would occur. What I really need is to say all of this to you and stop pretending to be strong. Can we work out a plan together to tackle this situation, then I can relax knowing that it will be okay.

When I start to get scared or frustrated can you please just give me a hug, help me to feel okay, safe, reassured that all is okay. I would love it if we could do that. I know it is not your job to look after me, I will look after me, I am just sharing how I feel. I will do my best to let go and trust you to do what is agreed to. I may slip up and be pushy occasionally – this has been a lifetime habit. If I do slip up just let me know and give me a hug. Please don’t get mad at me. I mean no harm, I’m just scared and need to be comforted and reassured. Thank you for loving me, listening to me, and caring for me. I love you and value you and want to treat you better and I will do so. Thank you’

If a person who has been over controlling like this can speak their truth, the armour can start to melt, they can let go of the rigidity, soften the emotions and feel their heart beat. They will need to learn self supportive talking techniques to reassure themselves whenever they start feeling vulnerable. They will need to learn positive thinking / thought stopping skills, so they can stop a negative thought in its tracks and change it to a more positive one. ‘Yes, I used to believe it would be a disaster if …. occurred. I know now that I would cope, even if it did occur. In all the years of worrying about …… it has never or rarely happened and even when it has, it hasn’t been that bad. I’ve coped. I’ve survived. I’ve learned and I’m okay!’

Free-Bird

Worry is pointless, it really is, let it go. Let go of wasting your days in fear. Let it go. Focus on your breathing and calm your body this way. Deepen your breathing as much as you can. Long breaths into the belly help your body to calm and to regulate itself. Fear chemicals will get dissolved and you can return to a state of balance and peace.

Know that those people who appear most rigid, have the most emotion locked inside them. They have not processed and released it. They have bottled it up inside and they are like a pressure cooker waiting to explode. They are under great internal pressure that they need to learn to regulate, to let the steam out little by little, in manageable ways until the pressure has dissipated.

The body actually has a natural mechanism to do this. It will ‘tremor’ to release the tension, stress and trauma that has accumulated in the body. You can activate the tremoring mechanism to safely discharge the blocked energy and calm your nervous system out of fight and flight back to peace. If you would like to learn more about the tremoring process see the Trauma and Tension Release Exercises (TRE) page of my website.

Processing the emotions underneath controlling behaviour will take time and courage to face the truth of your feelings and drop your personality mask. It requires a willingness to be vulnerable, to meet and reveal your true self, your inner child and all the hurts that have been hidden. Doing so leads to freedom, to inner peace, better relationships and more enjoyment of life. It is worth doing. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (29 October 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How to overcome disappointment with your life?

pathDisappointment comes from wishing things had been different, from being unhappy with what was. But as you hold yourself in that place of unhappiness your future can not be happy. So to overcome disappointment with your life you need to learn to be happy and accept what is.

No matter what life brings you, you can always choose happiness. It is a choice. You can choose to celebrate the gifts you do have – food, shelter, friends, a job. Even if you don’t like the job or the home, at least you have one. Appreciate them. Appreciate all the good in your life, then things can improve.

are you happyLiterally, as you chose to focus on what you want and taking steps towards it, you create the future anew and positive, supportive chemicals in your body. As you focus on the old, on the fact that nothing changes or that you have missed out on so much, you are creating sad, depressive chemicals in your body, which is why your body will then feel lethargic, at a loss, no motivation to do anything. You are bogging yourself down with heavy baggage. You have to let it go.

Doing so involves living in the moment, creating fun and joy. Do this. It can be as simple as playing some music that uplifts you or makes you laugh and want to dance. Light candles, incense and decorate your home in such a way that it feels a peaceful, happy place to dwell. Colour can really help to brighten things up. Spending time in nature also helps lighten the load – the green of the grass, trees, shrubs, etc opens our heart chakra back up, so we can feel connected, held, supported.

Your parents did the best they knew how and while you may wish that was different, it is the truth, and what occurred is what happened. You can’t change that and no matter how much you wish it was different, it can’t be. It has happened. Your choice is to waste your now upset about it or to use your energy to create an enjoyable now and a future you will enjoy and be proud of.

If nagging thoughts, sadness and preoccupation with the past continues to haunt you, then see a therapist to help you ‘unhook’ from it. There are many ways to do this – EFT, Psych-K, Lifeline Technique and more. Lots of ways to change subconscious beliefs and patterning that keeps you stuck in the old way. Family constellations can help shift the dynamics in the family so love can flow freely from the ancestors to the current generation. These are energetic processes that can help free you from what was and find peace. They don’t change the past but help you to see them and react to them differently. It doesn’t matter what the others involved do now. They don’t have to change for you to be happy. It is you who has to change, to see the truth of what is and to take responsibility for creating a life you desire.

be what you needAcknowledge the sadness of your inner child who is waiting for you to love him/her and to play with him/her. You can be the best parent to yourself. You can talk nicely to yourself, buy yourself presents, take yourself on excursions and outings to fun and interesting places. You can nurture yourself with massage and treats. You can cook yummy, healthy food for yourself and go on adventures. You are the one who can free yourself and give yourself the love that you need.

Literally, you can talk to your inner child and comfort him/her, give him/her a hug and hold her close. You can bring him/her into your heart chakra and tell him/her how much you love him/her and how precious he/she is. If you don’t have time to go on an actual outing, you can do a guided visualisation with your inner child and see yourself having fun.

It is up to you, you have to choose to prioritise time for having fun, for making your life how you want it to be. Next time a disappointment thought comes up change it to something more positive and take action to have fun – to do something you always wanted to do but didn’t get to do. Go dancing, play a sport, go camping, have an adventure. Do it. Do it. Do it.

If you are finding it difficult to choose to do things differently, to see the goodness around you, it can be because you still have emotional pain inside – be it sadness, anger or resentment. This creates stress and tension in your body.

It helps to release the stress and tension so that your body relaxes more, you feel lighter and then it is easier to do something different. While you are weighed down with the heavy baggage you feel sluggish, lethargic and like there’s no point trying, it’s too hard.

There are many ways to release stress and tension out of your body. One that I use and teach others is Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE). TRE is literally a process for activating the body’s natural stress, tension and trauma releasing process. Your body will shake out all that no longer serves it over time, freeing you of the density and enabling you to lighten up and have fun. To see examples of TRE in use and to learn more about it visit the TRE page of my website.

The mundane can be made extraordinary when you release your stress and emotional pain, change your self-talk and subconscious programming.

bad attitude flat tire change itWho says your life should be any different? Why does life owe you more? Who do you think you are to know more than God? Your life was set before you incarnated. You chose the lessons you wanted to master and the people and situations to help you do so. It is all unfolding as it needs to and life brings you the events, people and situations to help you grow. When you accept this and flow with what is, life is much easier. It is only when we resist this, fight against it, etc, that we struggle. So let go of the struggle and flow with life. It really is okay to do so and you deserve it. You deserve to be happy and enjoy your life. Let go of expectations and accept what is. Choose to enjoy each day, to see the beauty all around you, to see the smile and joy of children, animals and nature. It is up to you – choose to see and feel the joy or choose the gloom and doom. You are harming yourself if you choose to stay stuck. You can move forward as soon as you are willing to let go of the past, be in the now, and take action to create the future you desire. You can do it. It is worth the effort. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (10 Sept 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Focus on what is right in your life, not on what is wrong

My higher self gave me this simple but important advice (19 Nov 2014).

When you fall into a low mood wondering if it is all worth it, it is because you are focused on what is wrong with the world and your life, instead of focusing on what is right and possible. You are getting better at focusing on what you want, on believing it is possible, on enjoying life regardless of the situation.

Jodi-Anne’s career – a brief overview

Jodi-Anne started her career as a local government Environmental Health Officer. She soon became interested in how to obtain behaviour change for sustainability and specialised in this area. She conducted the research for her PhD on this topic with a focus on business sustainability. Since then she has branched into activities for creating more sustainable and adaptable communities where people work in partnership for the good of all.

Jodi-Anne studied to become a Counsellor majoring in healing from Child Abuse, as she wanted to help heal herself and those around her who had suffered painful beginnings to life. She saw how deeply this affected people and limited their ability to love and accept themselves, to connect with others and with the Earth. She saw how the emotional pain people held inside led to dysfunction and disease, in particular to consumption and addiction. These coping mechanisms are ultimately unhelpful – burdening the individual, society and the environment. We need to heal ourselves so that we can be peaceful and harmonious in our interactions with our self, others and the Planet.

Jodi-Anne has a Bachelor of Applied Science (Environmental Health), a Post Graduate Diploma in Natural Resource Management, a PhD in obtaining behaviour change for sustainability, a Diploma in Professional Counselling (Abuse) and a Certificate IV in Workplace Training and Assessment. She has designed and facilitated leadership development programs for business and government organisations in conjunction with Global Achievers Company. She has also taught sustainability related topics at the University level and the Vocational Education and Training Sector level (TAFE). She enjoys teaching and continues to do so teaching a range of personal development workshops at the WEA (a local community college in South Australia).

Jodi-Anne loves to learn and is grateful for all she has experienced in her life. She now sees the painful childhood as a gift that has helped her evolve, learn self-love, forgiveness and true peace. She knows that if she had not been sexually abused and left alone so much by her parents who were out drinking, she would not have gained her immense desire for growth and healing. She would not have focused so much on learning and study. It was her pain that propelled her forward, fuelled her determination to have a successful career and feel some sense of security and control. Of course that would later be shattered as she realised the perfection of it all and surrendered to the guidance of the Universe, showing her how she could best serve the Planet based on her experiences.

Here is a link to view Jodi-Anne’s sustainability publications.