Categories
Parenting Sustainability

Family breakdown and social fragmentation

In times past families were physically located closer together which helped strengthen connection and unity. Now families are spread across the globe. Aging parents don’t necessarily have loved ones near by to take care of them.

Our society, in general, is focused on achieving success, material wealth and individual advancement. This paradigm does not reward caring for the elderly. The elderly are seen as a nuisance, a problem to be handled and solved rather than the wisdom keepers, the pioneers, the treasure trove of support that they can be.

Grandparents can make a massive positive influence on children. This is especially needed in today’s world where many children are suffering from a lack of loving nurturing attention. Either because their parents have separated or even if together they are so busy that the children don’t get quality one on one time. Parents role model this lack of connection and this need to succeed and acquire wealth to their children who then grow and perpetuate this cycle.

What is needed and could solve this problem?

  • Parents realising what their children need is their love; their time; to play; to feel special, wanted and loved. They don’t need to watch more TV or have another computer game. They don’t need junk food and hurried eating. They need time together growing food, preparing nutritious meals and connection while eating them. Be a positive role model for your children for they learn from your every move.
  • Choose a simpler lifestyle so you do have time to play with and nurture your children. Listen to them, get to really know them. If you can’t do this all the time, ensure there are other people who can. This is where grandparents play  a valuable role.  Children need connection and ideally that connection should come from people they love and trust, not physical objects or strangers / movie stars. This is why children form gangs – for connection, for a place to belong. Help them feel like they belong at home. Let them know they are loved. Encourage them to care for self, others and the planet by role modelling this for them.
  • Where the elderly are isolated it is useful for the wider community to engage with them and show them their value. Start community gardening initiatives where young people work in the yards of the elderly to grow vegetables, flowers and trees – to form connections and roots, to share the produce. Many homes are now being built on tiny little blocks and don’t have much garden space. Older homes often have larger yards and once past a certain age it is hard for people to dig the soil and do all the bending, lifting, etc that is a part of gardening. But if we work together we don’t have to loose that joy of gardening or the expertise people who have gardened for decades have. We can share and learn from each other.
  • Community building initiatives such as communal gardens, such as sharing equipment like lawn mowers, whipper snippers and other tools can save the need for each family to purchase their own. This saves money and physical resources which benefits the planet. It also means you don’t have to work so hard as you don’t need to buy all the gadgets yourself.
  • There’s lots of things that can be done to strengthen community cohesiveness and have fun at the same time. Get to know your neighbours, find the people who are passionate about sustainability and work together to raise awareness and make changes in your neighbourhood. By making it fun, social and engaging more people are likely to join in. We will explore this more in future posts.

For now just know that we can turn this around. We can have strong family bonds and cohesiveness. We can have community’s that care and share. We can have happiness and harmony. We just have to make the choices and take the actions to create this in the world.

From my heart to yours, Jodi-Anne

Categories
Healing from child abuse Self help techniques

Poetry as a tool for healing

A large part of the healing journey is releasing buried emotions stored within your body. In order to do so you have to first get in touch with them. Many forms of creative expression can help us to do exactly that. Some people journal, some draw, some sing and some write poetry. Find what type of creative expression works for you. The benefits are enormous.

While we are being creative we operate more from the right side of the brain. This side of our brain is linked to our emotions and intuition. Hence, we can access our feelings and intuitive information from within us. It is much harder to do that when we are operating from our left brain which is focused on logic, reason, and analysis.

A lot of people in our society are very strongly left brained. We are taught to focus on the facts in school, to learn the right answer, and be rational and realistic. The message passed down in school is that being playful, creative, imaginative, and artistic is not as valuable to society and that if we want to succeed in life we should focus on learning a profession. But a focus on the facts and logic separates us from our hearts and our spirit. For many people it feels like a deadening, a deep loss. It is time to resurrect the creative, to reconnect to your heart and soul. Let loose and be creative. Your poems or art does not have to be beautiful or perfect. That’s not the point. The point is about feeling within yourself and letting out whatever is inside waiting to be released.

I wrote poetry for a few years prior to my entering therapy. I then switched to art as my main form of creative expression. Here are a few of my poems from the past.

 

The last tree. (By: Jodi-Anne M Smith, c1998)

The last tree, is a tree for us all to see, but how long will it last- as long as it has in the past?
We, humans who believe that all is ours to rape and plunder. Have destroyed the Earth and its no wonder,
Because people believe that they are the best, and they don’t seem to care about all the rest.
We are human, but also animal, and we have no right to ruin life especially on a planet as beautiful as this.
Rivers no longer flow, trees no longer grow. Volcanoes continuously blow, the atmosphere unstable, forever changing as carbon dioxide takes over and oxygen disappears
Because we cut down the trees, that help us to breathe. We cut down the trees, to use as we pleased.
But now we must pay; for the mistakes we have made. Hopefully before it’s too late.
Save the last tree, help it to breathe and then maybe we’ll see, that nature is more beautiful than the goods that are made, from the beautiful trees.
 

Strange Game (By Jodi-Anne M Smith 12/9/1998)

Life can be a strange game.You play to win, to earn and to succeed.But sometimes in winning you lose the lead.
Obtaining the goal can be enthralling.But if all you have is that, then the moment is fleeting
Forever searching, powering on, to find the next run, next glow, next surge – Fake fun
Giving your all to such a quest, is dangerous and destructive, it hurts you at best
It doesn’t really matter how high you climb, If you can’t open your eyes and see, if you can’t enjoy the view and the breeze.
Society tells us that we must succeed, but sometimes I wonder if that is what we really need
 Live life, rest and breathe.
 

Going low in order to grow (By Jodi-Anne M Smith 27/9/1998)

 My life I have simplified, I have removed the sources of stress, the result has been remarkable – I am at ease and at rest.
 I came close to losing my mind, before I paid attention to the warning signs.A dangerous situation where I was afraid and upset.
The people around me who saw me so bad, have now come to realise the pain I suffer and this has made them sad
It seems they have realised that I need them so, and now they are there and are helping me to grow.
 Communication is occurring, Our love we are sharing, and together we are finding strength and happiness.It is a great feeling to know they are there and that they care.
 I am healing and blossoming, growing and coming alive. I am happy and relaxed, I’m living my own life.
 It is unfortunate that in order for this to happen, I felt like I almost died.I was so sad and depressed all I could do was cry.
I thought my life I needed to change completely. But this was not true. I just needed to take it easier and to my heart be true.
 Now that I have done that I feel better than before, I feel capable of doing anything. I can take what ever life has in store.
 But one thing I know, one thing is for sure. I won’t ever again let myself get so low.
In future the warning signs I won’t ignore – I will pay attention when they come to the fore.
 But as always does, good has come from bad, and in some ways I had to get so sad, before I could get glad.
I had to get so low in order to grow. But now that I am there, it is go, go, go.
Together with everyone, my love I show.
Bliss and happiness – together we bloom and we grow!
Categories
Conscious Evolution Personal Development Uncategorized

Snippets of wisdom…

Snippets of wisdom channeled July 2013.

Follow your heart. It will lead you where you most need to go – to be on purpose, on love and on bliss. For you can have these feelings all the time if you allow it.

Listen to your heart it will tell you what you need to do to have health, happiness and inner peace.So breathe into your heart. Visualise golden light awakening and enlivening it and let that light shine forth – soothing and awakening all souls you come in contact with. Spread love and light wherever you go and you will be a powerful servant of God – without even uttering a word.

You don’t have to have the answers or any knowledge. Just an open heart, that is all that is needed. Needed so much in all of society. Blessed BE. Light the way and enjoy each and every day as you live your life in gratitude and joy for all things.

Categories
Healing from child abuse

Subconscious beliefs: pleasure is not okay.

Today I woke up feeling great peace and joy in my body. I felt like celebrating. I didn’t know what I was celebrating. As the day wore on I felt pleasure, joy at being alive and at feeling so good. After a while I noticed that I felt a little agitated. I couldn’t sit any longer and just BE or read or do pleasurable activities. Part of me was wanting to push, to achieve, to do. Part of me was upset about me feeling pleasure.

When I felt into that agitation and breathed through the resistance I heard a quiet thought that said to me that feeling pleasure was not okay. A scene from my childhood filtered up to consciousness and I felt shame and dirty. I witnessed a time when I was about 5 years old and a the son of friends of my Mother’s would visit and play doctor with me. We would sneak into the spare bed, take off our underwear and touch each other. It was quite innocent, but he told me that I couldn’t tell my Father about it as my Dad would be very angry with me. This was the seed of the subconscious beliefs that ‘pleasure is not okay’.

As I witnessed this scene and felt into the associated memories and emotions I cried. I cried tears of sorrow and anguish over what we had done and the impact it has had on my life. It led to me not allowing myself to feel lasting pleasure. It led me to feel that pleasure was a dirty, shameful thing that should be hidden. It taught me that feeling pleasure will lead to punishment. That it is naughty and something I will get told off for. These formed deep, core beliefs that have affected me ever since.

Thankfully I have learned how to reprogram subconscious beliefs so now when ever such an unhelpful belief pops up I can replace it with a belief that I would prefer using the Psych-K process.

Today as I sat and listened within I heard a number of related issues to be reprogrammed and the list below is the new beliefs that I programmed into my subconscious.

  • smiley-heart-love-Feeling pleasure, peace is okay
  • I am allowed to feel pleasure
  • I deserve to feel pleasure
  • It is safe for me to feel pleasure
  • Positive things come from my feeling pleasure
  • I am accepted when I feel pleasure
  • I accept pleasure into my life
  • I AM PLEASURE

These beliefs now form my core operating programs in relation to pleasure so I should start to notice some subtle and or significant shifts in my behaviour and what I attract / allow into my life. YAY!!!!!!

Written by Dr. Jodi-Anne M Smith, 25/07/13

Categories
Conscious Evolution Healing from child abuse Personal Development

Snippets of wisdom…

Snippets of wisdom channeled July 2013.

Life is what life is. Its going to happen regardless. You can choose to judge it, fight it, be angry or miserable about it or you can choose to enjoy it and accept it.

Categories
Conscious Evolution Healing from child abuse Personal Development

Snippets of wisdom…

Snippets of wisdom channeled June 2013.

You don’t have to have a complex life. You don’t have to save the world, find the solutions. It is okay to do work you enjoy. It is okay to choose a simple life that fulfills you and brings you joy. This is the goal! To move beyond ego, beyond searching and seeking and be simple and still. To accept and flow with what is. To love life, serve yourself and others being anchored in God’s love.

This was a powerful message for me from my higher self. For most of my life I have felt driven to ‘save the world’, to ‘save Mother Earth’, to find the solutions for sustainability. I have known for a long time that this compulsive drive stemmed from my childhood conditioning – from wanting to save my Mother from an abusive husband (my step-dad), and from wanting to succeed enough that my Dad might take me back, might love me. My Dad loves nature and I spent a lot of time in nature with him when I was a young child, so in my mind it seemed natural to think that if I achieved in the sustainability field it would matter to him. Despite knowing the source of this pattern and the fact that my desire to rescue Mother Earth was just a projection of my needing to save myself, the pattern has remained in place. Partly because I didn’t feel that I was a worthwhile human being unless I was being of service to the Earth or to others. I felt unwanted, unlovable, and unsafe interacting with the world. I hid who I really was behind the work-a-holic, super achiever. This helped me cope, but it didn’t lead to happiness. It led to a lot of seclusion and ultimately depression when I finally faced the fact that success meant nothing.

Since that realisation I have done a lot of soul searching and reprogramming of my subconscious beliefs to know that I am lovable, I am good enough, I am wanted and worthwhile. This helped and for the last few years I have focused more on honouring myself and living a simple life. I have only worked part time and I haven’t focused on achieving very much at all. I live in the country surrounded by nature and I grow my own vegies, collect fire wood for our wood heater and compost our food scraps. This way of living makes my heart sing. I am at peace amongst nature and in the quietude of life. But too much isolation isn’t healthy either! Too much isolation leads to loneliness and eventually depression.

So now I’m venturing back out into the world and aiming to have balance between working and living simply. It is an interesting process watching the old stuff come up and being grateful that I can just lovingly dismiss it. I am not hooked by it. I don’t have to achieve. I don’t have to ‘save’ anyone or anything. It is okay for me to relax and enjoy life. It is okay for me to play and let people close. It is okay for me to love and follow my heart. It is okay for me to marry and have a baby. It has taken a long time to reach this place of peace. There has been lots of resistance, lots of grief and lots of fear. A big part of me would prefer to hide forever and keep people at a distance. But not my heart. My heart wants to love fully and deeply, to honour all who I come in contact with, including myself. I know now it is okay to be me. That it is enough and that it is all I need to do. It’s time to enjoy life and being me!!

Categories
Conscious Evolution Healing from child abuse Personal Development

Snippets of wisdom….

Snippets of wisdom channeled June 2013.

You went through what was needed to get you to God and it worked. Now you must live in both worlds.

You are second guessing the Divine and that is always pointless.

Just because you can’t see how it is going to work out, doesn’t mean it won’t. You are required to trust and have faith.

Sometimes it is tempting to question what the hell is going on here on Earth. I mean, seriously, do we have to go through so much pain and suffering? Do we have to become so lost in despair before we can find peace and happiness? The answer, for me, is yes. If life was all rosy and easy then we wouldn’t turn to God for help, we wouldn’t surrender to a higher power. We would live simply from the ego fulfilling our every desire and focused on achieving more, having more pleasure, and getting more material stuff. This is true for a lot of people. There may be some saints out there who go beyond the ego level without suffering first, but they are far and few in between.

It is often the case that people only open up to a higher purpose in life once they have hit rock bottom. Once they have tried all that they can do to heal themselves or lift themselves up out of the painful situation that they are in. It is when we fall to our knees in desperation and we call out to a God we may not even believe in or believe can help us, that we start to surrender, that we start to separate from the ego and to embrace a new possibility.

For me, and many I know, it was my pain that caused me to open to a wider version of life than I ever knew was possible. I embraced personal growth, spirituality and eventually God. I reveled in the peace, the love, the joy that was found in such communities. The safe space that was created when wounded but loving people joined together in search of healing and happiness. I LOVED THIS! But I embraced it so much I stopped interacting in the real world. I lost focus on my career, on life. All I wanted to do was healing type activities and spend time with healing focused people. I lost balance. I lived in my higher chakras and not my lower chakras.

To be truly healthy we need to live in both worlds, to interact with all people and to spread love where ever we go. It doesn’t matter what your job is, you can spread love with those you interact with – be it just a smile, a kind word, a listening ear. You can positively impact all that you come in contact with, just by being YOU, just by being patient, kind and loving. That is being of service. You don’t have to go live in an ashram or give up all your material possessions. You just need balance – a foot in each world. We are spiritual beings in human bodies living an Earthly life.

Categories
Conscious Evolution Healing from child abuse Personal Development

Snippets of wisdom….

Snippets of wisdom channeled June 2013.

Follow your intuition, when it guides you to something but otherwise just BE, turn within – the answers you seek are there.

Don’t force yourself to do anything. Wait until you want to do something then do it.

This advice was given to me by my higher self when I was struggling to do what I felt I needed to do. I felt overburdened emotionally and physically with my to do list. Spirit advised me to be kind to myself, to not force myself to keep doing, doing, doing. This has been one of my biggest patterns this lifetime – I value work and achieving and have seen resting as foolish and lazy. Of course keeping busy means you don’t have to feel the emotions building inside, you can keep shoving them down until of course they explode! Not an effective coping mechanism in the long run.

I find it hard to shut off if I have something I feel I need to do. But I have followed my higher self’s advice often enough to know it is true. If I force myself to mark those assignments or do that task which I don’t really feel like doing, I end up doing it but it s hard work, I’m resentful and exhausted by it. Whereas if I trust that I don’t feel like it for a reason, if I go off and read a book, go for a walk, or call a friend – if I honour my needs first – then sure enough a time does come when I am willing to do the task and I can now do it from a place of love and joy. Sometimes it seems like time is running out, but the task always gets done. A burst of energy comes when needed. I am learning to trust this process and surrender into grace, into God’s timing not my timing.

Categories
Conscious Evolution Personal Development

Snippets of wisdom….

Snippets of wisdom channeled May – June 2013.

Just do what makes you happy.

You don’t need fixing neither does anyone else. Just spread love.

When you feel despair know that you’ve lost resonance – you’ve lowered energy and gone into shadow – so do a balancing process and reconnect to your radiant self, to God and to your heart.

Many of us feel like we need fixing, like there is something wrong with us, that we’re not good enough or not okay as we are. In reality that is just our perception based on a lot of conditioning from the past. When we fall into this way of thinking it is easy to beat ourselves up, to become angry or upset, to fall into despair and grief. The black hole can get bigger and bigger depending on our thinking patterns and the actions we take.

When you start to beat yourself up, stop, take a deep breath and a step back. Try to witness what is going on and to see where you are feeling vulnerable. What is it that has been triggered? What is it that you are afraid of? Send yourself love. Give yourself the consolation and comfort that you need. Be the good parent to your own inner child.

We actually are all perfect as we are. Any damage we carry is just emotional baggage that can be released. We are still whole and complete underneath it. We just have to release the baggage and take off all those layers of protection that keep us feeling small and behaving that way.

To do that all we need to do is to accept our self and how we are feeling. So instead of beating your self up, stop, breathe, recognise the pattern and the thoughts. Send love to your self and the parts of you that are hurting. Breathe into your heart chakra and connect with your emotions. Allow them to flow through you. Just breathe. If you need to scream, scream. If you need to cry, cry. If you need to release rage do so – just do it in a way that does not hurt you or anyone else. Some people yell, some people punch a punching bag, go for a long walk or run, do whatever you need to do to shift the emotion. And know it is just that emotion. Once you release it you can balance back up.

Many of us are afraid to release our emotions, afraid that if we let some of it out, the rest will come pouring out and over whelm us. It’s okay. Support yourself through the process. If you need to have a friend with you, do so or if you need to have someone you can ring if you really struggle then arrange it. If you need to see a therapist to help you learn the skills of emotional release and balancing then do so. Whatever works for you is okay. There’s no need to keep swallowing it and pushing it down. You don’t need to punish yourself any more. Let freedom in. Make space for it by clearing out the old emotions and baggage. Create space for love, joy, laughter and peace. It is well worth the effort!

 

Categories
Conscious Evolution Healing from child abuse

Snippets of wisdom…..

Snippets of wisdom channeled April 2013.

You judged, feared, panicked and it was not necessary. God will always take care of you and provide what you need.

You are struggling because you resist what is.

You are not broken and you don’t need fixing. You forget that when you feel blue. Remember you are perfect as you are.

Expect less, enjoy more…