Why do we fight against what is?

You fight against what is because you know it is not meant to be the way it is. Life can be loving, kind, joyful, filled with connection, fun and peace, but for most of you it is not. It is often filled with drudgery, monotony, boredom, loneliness and sadness. Inside you know this is not needed, you know love and freedom to be yourself and follow your heart is needed. You know this, so you fight against what is.

The fight, the resistance, doesn’t serve you. It just upsets you, makes getting through the day even harder. It limits you, you feel restricted, annoyed, agitated and your emotions could spiral lower and turn into a bad mood, through which you then view the present as unacceptable, life as challenging and other people as obstacles to getting your tasks done.

When you drop into such a low vibration state, you can feel depressed about life and wonder if this is all it will ever be. But it won’t. It is changing all the time. You are healing each day and as you heal your vibration changes, and what you attract into your life changes. You are only where you are, because of your thinking and your emotional density. Let that go and you can be as light as a feather. Trusting life can be as easy as breathing, when your heart is heard and your body clear.

For most people this is a long way off. That’s okay. It just is. Your physical body could not cope with letting go of all the density in one moment. It would explode! It has to be done bit by bit, layer by layer, so your body and your thinking can adjust, so you can cope with it all.

Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) can help you to slowly ‘shake off’ all that built up tension, stress and trauma within. TRE is your body’s natural mechanism for releasing stress, tension and trauma. It activates a ‘shaking mechanism’ where your nervous system discharges all that stagnant energy stored in the body.

It opens you back up to flowing more freely, to being connected within, embodied, grounded, able to be present to the now, not tied up in the past or worrying about the future. When your body and nervous system calms it’s much easier to be present, to connect with others and enjoy what is occurring around you.

You will get there. It is your destiny to walk the Earth free from fear, restriction, hardship and poor health. You will shine brightly, have fun and follow your heart. You will still work, but it will be work you love, being of service to the whole in your unique way. You resist the now, fight against it, because you already want to be at the end place where life is more blissful.

hot air balloonBut know it is a  journey, it is meant to take time and even when you get to that blissful future place there will still be challenges and opportunities to grow and evolve further. That is life, that is evolution, that is how it is meant to be. You will just go through them more easily when you no longer fight against it. You simply accept what is and let it pass, knowing this too shall pass and brighter, more light filled times will come. They will.

You sense what is to come and want to be there NOW. No waiting, no stopping to pass go, now, now, now. In your impatience you create resistance, which actually slows it down. Your vibration drops, it is like hitting the pause button. Your future is hurtling towards you on a conveyor belt, good things are coming, they have to when your vibration is high. But if you get consistently upset, angry, depressed, frustrated, etc, your vibration drops and the conveyor belt slows. Your future is still coming, but slower, in a sense, because really it happens as it needs to. But you get the picture. Your emotions create resistance and this slows your ability to enjoy your now and to move into your future joyful states.

It is hard to explain in words. What is destined will be. It is pointless fighting against it or worrying about it. It will happen. What you can influence or change is how you feel during the journey to it. You can suffer if you choose negative feelings and thoughts or you can flow and be happy if you choose to just witness what is and trust what will come is what is needed, and it will be as it should be. TRUST. SURRENDER. HAVE FAITH. Know you don’t need to do anything in particular. What is set, is set. You just determine how you experience the ride. If we were you we would choose peace and joy. Why not? They feel great!

So don’t fight against what is, know it is a point in time leading you forth to what you do want. The now is a cleansing period for releasing what no longer serves you, so that your desired state can manifest. You know deep down that peace and harmony are your natural state and you can be that all the time if you accept what is and all aspects of life that occur. You don’t need to judge them, hate them, feel angry about whatever occurred or towards whoever was involved. Do what is needed to resolve the issue and balance back up to peace and joy.

In time you will do it automatically, because you won’t want to stay feeling any other way. You won’t let life events knock you around so much, as feeling good will be your top priority. You can do it and you will do it. It is just a stepping stone away from the cosmic perspective or a journey away this lifetime as you walk your path towards living with ease and grace.

So be thankful for what is, know that even the most challenging times are helping you clear out the emotional density and vibrational blocks, so that you can have what you want. You have lifetimes of density to release, oodles of fear and hate and density to release. It takes time. It takes a lot of time to release your judgements and conditioning, so you can walk freely, singing joyously, as you go about your day. Trust the process. Trust life and enjoy each moment. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (28 May 2016).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How to get out of your own way?

Many of you block your own progress with worry and fear. There is no need to worry, life will take you where you need to go for your highest evolution and growth. Worry does not slow the process down, it just makes it more painful. You do not have choice or the power to change your fate. You only have the power to change the level of ease and grace through which you experience what occurs.

What is to occur is set prior to your incarnation. So stop trying to control it or trying so hard to get somewhere, something. You can not achieve more than you are meant to. You can not evolve any  faster than is destined. Your influence is miniscule in the BIG picture of life.

Yes, you do have choice to feel that emotion surfacing or push it down. But if you push it down it will just come up again another day. If it needs to be flet it will keep surfacing until you feel it. You have no choice in the matter, it must be felt. You must evolve. You cannot fail or slow it down. What will be, will be. Life will bring you the people, events, situations and experiences necessary to move you along your path, so relax and enjoy the ride. hot air balloonKnow there will be easy times and challenging times. Don’t fight against the challenges. Don’t live in fear of what may occur. Just ride the waves with gratitude, knowing that this too shall pass. The sun will come out from behind the clouds, storms are only temporary. Spring will always be sprung! So, enjoy life more, have more fun. Let go of being on guard, of being so careful and serious.

You can’t get it wrong. You can’t prevent what needs to occur and conversely your lack of scanning for danger will not stop danger or attract more of it. What is meant to be, will be. You are safe. You are loved and cared for by the Divine. Any ‘negative’ experiences are part of what was needed for your growth. In time you will see that. In time you may see the growth and see the gift that the event gave you. At the time of a ‘disaster’ it won’t seem like a gift, but it is. That job loss, relationship end, accident or health crisis led you to a new direction, a new phase of your life, which led to clearing and raising your vibration. It all happens to lead you forth. No mistakes. Nothing haphazard. Nothing by chance. So relax – you’ve got this!! Your higher self has it all under control, so glide through life with ease and grace, see it as a skate in the park, a picnic with the ducks, a walk through the forest, an adventure of a lifetime. For that is what life is, a grand adventure, one that can be filled with ease and grace if you get out of your own way and accept what comes.

Accept what comes, accept what goes, trust it is all occurring for your highest good. See the lessons, learn the code, read the clues, do better the next time – react differently, have firmer boundaries, be more kind and loving – whatever it is. Life is just giving you opportunities to practice, until you master being a being of love and light, walking with grace on Earth, inspiring others to open their hearts and let their lights shine. That is what life on Earth is about. It can be fun or drudgery based on how you think and react to what occurs. Only you can make the decision to glide gracefully through all that occurs. Do so and life is much more fun.

But please don’t beat yourself up if you do worry, if you fall into fear, anger, harshness and cruelty. These are only defense patterns surfacing to be released, to be loved and accepted. They just show you that part of you is still hurting, still sad or afraid and in need of love. Love those parts of yourself and welcome them back into your heart. Welcome them home to be cared for, to play and be at ease again. As you do so you become more whole and integrated, then the defense patterns disappear. They dissolve as they are no longer needed. So when you act in less than loving ways, accept it, take responsibility for what you have done, apologise to those affected if needed and then do your inner work so it will happen less and less. Noone is perfect. Noone can be loving all the time. You are human after all. You are here to learn and grow and you are doing wonderfully. The fact that you are reading this shows your heart is opening up, your light is shining and you are embracing your magnificence. For you are magnificent. We all are. We just don’t see it clearly until we have released our past hurts and opened up to see life as it is – a glorious opportunity to evolve and grow through all sorts of experiences while here on Earth.

Enjoy each day knowing you will get where you need to go. No need for worry, fear or controlling life. Relax. Breathe. Enjoy. Choose peace and harmony with all you do. Blessed BE. Your life is very good and it is going to keep getting better and better as you open your heart more and more and shine your light more fully. You are beautiful beings of light just waiting for the chance to ee more clearly the beauty of who you are and of what life brings you. It is all good. It all serves a purpose and it is all helping you to awaken, to learn to support yourself and to choose peace and harmony with all you do. You will get there, at the right time and place. No race, no pushing, no controlling needed. Relax and flow through all that life brings you with ease and grace. So be it. Amen.

lightWe watch you and smile as you progress. We see your greatness and we know you will too. We celebrate as you realise you are enough, you are acceptable, worthy of love, health and abundance. You are worthy of all good things. As you accept and embrace this we can bring you the things you have always wanted. We can help you have Heaven on Earth. You can have it. You just have to get out of your own way and allow it. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (26 March 2016).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

What does it mean to be free of the past?

To be free of the past means to no longer be affected by it, which means you no longer think about it, cling to it, or be affected by it in your current day to day actions. It no longer informs your thinking, attitudes or expectations of what is to occur in the future.

To be free of the past means you are completely present to the moment, living now. Your energy is here now, not split between worry about the past and future, with only partial attention on the now.

When you are present now you can notice the signs and synchronicities that occur all around you, giving you feedback about how you are progressing in life and guiding you forward as to what to do next.

When you are present to life in the moment you notice your inner guidance, your intuition, and your body’s signals about what it wants from you. Your body will tell you what food is most beneficial to eat at each meal. If you are lacking a particular vitamin or amino acid you will get an inkling to eat a specific vegetable or meat if you need protein. Your body will tell you. You just have to be quiet enough in your mind to hear it.

Likewise, your body will tell you whether or not someone is being honest with you, or whether or not you should trust them. You will get messages to go certain places with no explanation of why. If you follow the inner advice you may be shocked that you bump into someone important to your goals at that place or find the perfect book to help you along your path.

Living in the now enables you to meet people a fresh – to not have tainted views of them based on past experiences. It means you can be friendly and kind to all with no baggage or preconceived notions of who they are.

There is much to gain from living in the now and breaking free of the past. But how do you do it? How do you let the past go? You do so with every breath, every thought, every action. You do so by paying attention to your now and calling your mind back to now whenever it wanders to the past or future. You do so as a loving discipline, centering yourself back to the now with your senses – focusing on what you see, feel, hear, taste and smell.

You can use Tension and Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) to help you to clear out the past energies, the tensions, stresses and traumas that have accumulated throughout your life and weigh you down.

It is these old stagnant energies that lead to our fears of events happening again. We still have the emotional pain inside and want to avoid feeling it again. it is all this past residue that keeps us away from living more fully in the moment.

TRE can help you to ‘shake out’ these old energies, thaw out any frozen shock and trauma, so that you can finally discharge that energy, let it go and focus more on your now. When your body is more relaxed and feeling safer, it is easier for you to live life from a more joyful place, connecting with others and having fun.

Your interactions with people will feel more satisfying and fulfilling as you will be connecting more deeply, intimately, seeing into each other’s soul, your essence, rather than distracted, surface chit-chat. Such deep interactions fill your cup with love and attention – you feel seen, heard, valued, loved and this fills you up.

You no longer need to scream out for attention or to be heard. You are seen and heard, first by yourself, then others. So make the effort to be more in the now. You will be surprised how much more enjoyable the day is, how much less stressful it is, and how much more productive it is. Achieve one task at a time without pressuring yourself by worrying about getting it all done. One step at a time is enough.

synchronicityYou don’t need to see the whole path in front of you, just the next few steps. When driving at night the car’s headlights illuminate the way in front of us, but we can only see a short distance ahead. We drive on trusting the next part of the road will be illuminated when we approach it. We don’t waste energy worrying if the road is there or not. We trust it is.

Similarly life leads us forth and we cannot get lost. The path we are to take is determined and we are guided to it. It is predestined, chosen before we birthed. It just plays out like a movie. We are the lead character and live through each scene, each chapter of our life. We are all held safe in God’s arms as we journey forth on this path of evolution and growth.

There are pot holes and obstacles on the road, but we are guided around them. Sometimes one’s car breaks down and we have to rest and repair it. This is all part of life. Some journeys are long and tedious, some are short and joyful. You never know what is going to occur each drive. It is part of the mystery and adventure. Even unexpected setbacks, accidents and tragedies are part of God’s plan, leading us forth, on this evolutionary journey.

Through pain we wake up to what is truly important in life. We let go of the mundane, rat-race and focus on what we really care about, what we are passionate about and makes our heart’s sing. Life is that journey to our singing hearts. Before the music is pitch perfect we have to clear out the baggage of the past and be able to live in the now. It is worth the effort. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (26 Nov 2015).
Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

How do we heal from child abuse?

A child who was neglected, beaten, belittled or raped as a child will have grown with high levels of fear in their body. They will have learned to always be on guard, to watch out for danger, to not trust anyone and be alone. They have learned to focus on survival at the expense of joy, friendship and love. A child abused does not know how to relax and be peaceful. They don’t know how to receive or give love as that doesn’t feel safe. They have shut off from the softer sides of life and hardened themselves to cope with all the pain, grief, loss, anger, shame and rage. They are a powder-keg of emotions that are held together by strong armouring and defense mechanisms designed to protect them from experiencing further hurt.

To heal from child abuse all this damage needs to be undone so light can enter and soothe the dark spaces within, so love can enter and melt the sadness away, so peace can enter and joy can flood their cells returning them to their natural state of being.

Healing is a long process of becoming aware of the conditioning and patterning and allowing it to be dismantled. It takes courage to risk opening back up. It takes bravery to feel and release the buried emotions and it takes great commitment to continue unraveling layer upon layer of beliefs and armouring that have kept the person isolated and safe. It takes a lot of physical energy for the body to process these shifts as each layer drops away.

Children who have been abused often feel worthless, unloved, unwanted and not good enough. Healing involves changing these beliefs to realise the truth that you are loved, wanted, cared for and provided for. Life will bring experiences to help with these awakenings and help the individual to heal. Therapists and other practitioners can help speed the process up or help the person to understand what is occurring, so that they can go through it more easily rather than fighting / resisting the changes occurring.

be ur own heroIt takes great strength to be willing to soften to feel your vulnerability. For that is what is needed so you can access the truth of your inner being and clear out all the blockages within.

All the trauma and painful experiences are stored within the body, locked into the muscles and cells. This is a protective mechanism so that the child can cope / stay on the planet. If the pain / trauma is too much to process when it is occurring it gets locked into the body, to wait until a time when the person is strong enough and ready to process it. So, unfortunately it is all stored inside waiting for the person to feel and release it. This is why abused children can feel so cold, like stone, rigid, because they are literally locked up inside with all these challenging memories and feelings. This will soften in time as they release all that has been trapped inside. But there is no magic bullet, no wiping it all away. It has to be felt and released, the energy processed, so your body can relax back into its natural state of peace and joy. You have to do the work to get back to this.

Tension and Trauma Release Exercises helps hugely with this release of blocked, trapped energy within the body. TRE is a process that activates the body’s natural mechanism for releasing stress, tension and trauma. The body will systematically shake out the contractions and release the stiffness enabling the body to come back to life more, to move through the emotional residue and open back up to love, laughter and play.

As the buried tension and emotions are released the body starts to feel safer, no longer under threat as the old trauma activations are completed. The past is known as the past. It no longer feels like it could happen again at any moment. The hyper-vigilant defensiveness softens and the person is able to be in the now more fully, not distracted by the past or worrying about the future.

The safer the body feels, the more space there is to focus on what you actually want to do and be in life, instead of automatically reacting to triggers from the buried trauma and pain.

It is worth the effort to heal the trauma so you gain that freedom to be you, to enjoy your life and have fun. TRE is a great tool to help with this. With consistent use of TRE your body will slowly unwind the tension and trauma patterns so you can move forward.

As unfair as it seems children who have been abused make massive leaps and bounds in their evolution as they heal and reach peace within. A lot is asked of them to heal and find inner peace, but the reward is mighty. Unlike those not affected, those who were abused have a burning desire to heal. The healing process can become the primary drive in their life as they want to escape the pain and find peace, joy, love. It is a force that cannot be stopped. Hence, they evolve quite quickly in that lifetime, as opposed to someone who has had an easy life and feels no need to focus on healing or personal growth. So, as painful as it is, on the larger scale of things it is a gift, an invitation to wholeness, to learn forgiveness, mastery of your thoughts and emotions and connection with your heart and God.

Do not lose hope. Yes, there is a lot of work to do to heal from child abuse, but there is also a lot of help out there. You just have to find what works for you. Most will need a therapist of some type as you have to learn to trust another, to feel your emotions and speak your truth. This cannot be done on your own. Books can only help so much. Support groups are very beneficial as long as their focus is on healing and growth – not just on sharing wounded stories, sympathizing with each other, but not progressing.

quote-holding-on-to-anger-is-like-grasping-a-hot-coal-with-the-intent-of-throwing-it-at-someone-else-you-buddha-26643As anger and rage is worked through you will learn not to blame your parents or others. You will see they knew no better and often received the same treatment themselves. You will learn in time to forgive, not for the sake of the other person, but for your own sake. As if you hold onto resentment it is only your life that is affected with the bitterness and misery. You forgive to set yourself free, to no longer let the past affect you or that person control you.

forgivenessAs you process your emotions layer upon layer of issues related to various topics will arise. Forgiveness is not a once off act, but something you have to keep doing as you gain further insight into how much your life has been affected by the abuse. It takes a lot of strength to reach within and forgive the unforgivable.

Don’t waste energy trying to understand why something was done to you and perhaps not to your siblings. Do not go there! It was not about you. Abuse is about the perpetrator’s pain. They just take it out on you. It is their wounding that they are not coping with and it gets passed onto you to deal with. This happens generation after generation until one person says “Enough, this stops with me”. They commit to healing for their own sake and the sake of their current or future children. They break the link to abuse and heal the family dynamics so that future generations do not have to suffer from the unfinished business of their elder generations. Family karma is completed and the future generations freed from the tyranny. It is a brave soul that takes this healing journey on and there are many such brave souls on the planet now.

Know that you are supported to heal and grow. The right course, book, movie, song will occur to give you the necessary insight or tool to move forward. Time in nature can help soothe your soul and get in touch with what you are really feeling inside. There is a lot of support available today through websites, support groups, government funded programs, private practitioners and more.

You will be guided where you need to go. Trust. Seek help when you need it and go within to learn your truth, to see your freedom and opportunity for growth. Prayer and meditation help greatly, however, many people in the early stages find this hard as they feel foolish going within, speaking to a God who they feel has let them down, who should have protected them and kept them safe. For many there is a lot of rage and even hate for God. Others feel he/she does not exist. Each will work through this in time and come to realise that God is there, loving them, supporting them and smiling at their progress.

As souls we choose to incarnate and experience what we do, so we can grow and evolve. We choose the experiences and the other souls who would hurt us. We chose it to learn from and evolve through. God gives us free will to choose this, to go through these experiences. He/she will not interfere and stop it from happening for that would short circuit our evolution and growth. God sits waiting for us to call out for help and assistance, for us to invite him/her in. Then he/she can assist us, sending us to the right place or person for support, or helping us hear our inner guidance and what to do next.

While healing from child abuse is a long and painful process it is one that leads to liberation and freedom, massive amounts of personal growth and emotional intelligence. It is a path for higher guidance and quick evolution. It is a path only the brave walk and God is there waiting to hold our hand when we ask. Blessed BE. Amen.

By Jodi-Anne (24 June 2015).

Further free guidance on healing techniques and self love are available on the Life Insights and Healing from child abuse pages of this website.

Art Therapy – art as a tool for healing.

Art is a very powerful healer. It helps us to express buried emotions that we may not even be conscious of. It can help release stress and tension as the energy moves from within us out onto the paper. It is therapeutic with its colours, textures and processes. In this booklet I will share some of my drawings from throughout my healing journey. The medium will mostly be coloured oil crayon drawings and some painted ones. I have also had experience with the use of clay, pastel crayons and other art forms as my mentor/counsellor was an Art Therapist. I loved experiencing and learning about the role of art in healing. I am very grateful to my Counsellor for all she has shown me and how she has helped me and others to heal.

One does not need to have any artistic skill to use art as a healing tool. Indeed I did not think of myself as artistic at all. When I started focussing on my healing journey I was a very head-strong, analytical, rational minded person. When Lynn asked me to draw for the first time I thought she was mad. I almost walked out the door thinking how ridiculous, as if drawing could help! It wasn’t long before the floodgates of my subconscious mind opened and drawings were pouring out of me. That is literally how it felt. I wouldn’t consciously think about what to draw or how to draw it. I’d just feel drawn to pick up a crayon and next thing there was a drawing on the paper. It just flowed out.

I was fascinated how at times of strong emotion I would draw and cry or yell at the same time. In these situations the most powerful drawings emerged clearly showing the power of the situations on which I was releasing emotion. I didn’t know how to draw what I drew. If I consciously tried to do it again later I wouldn’t know how. My mind would get in the way. I love how the colours often represent the chakras and the emotions being felt, the profound symbolism that comes through depicting the experiences. Here I have chosen some of my pictures that show the healing of my childhood issues, my relationship with myself and with my parents. I encourage you to embrace art as a tool to assist you in your healing journey.

(Extract from: Smith J, 2011, The healing journey demystified achieving sustainability one heart at a time, Lulu.com)